Given the number of catfishes (people who post pictures of people that are not them but claim to be) out there, I can understand why a person would be skeptical whether my pictures are real. Before I created my website, I used to get this question once in a while. However, I have put a lot time into my website and creating postings regularly on social media and on my blog, the question doesn’t make any sense to me in this context.
I recently had a random person message me on social media asking if my pictures are real. Typically I never reply because trying to convince someone that my pictures are real sounds like an exhausting feat. However, I decided to throw in a little sarcasm following up with questioning his question.
“No, they not me”, I replied. He said, “then who are you?”.
It was my turn to ask the questions.
Why would you message me if you don’t believe that I am real? It is clear that there is already a bit of skepticism on your part, which I can empathize with. And I’m sure there’s always someone who doubts if I’m real or not all the time - they may either never message me because they don’t believe that my pictures are real or they take their chances and book with me without asking for extra verbal reassurance. Of course, once people walk through my front door and see me waiting for them, they discover the spots that I take my photos in the condo are consistent with the photos being posted and so they quickly learn that all of my pictures are authentic.
If I’m lying about my photos, why wouldn’t I lie to you about whether they’re real or not? How do you validate that through one text message without meeting me? Asking someone a question that doesn’t make sense like that already puts you in a vulnerable position for others to see the fear and apprehension within you - even though you think this is a protective mechanism against getting catfished, but it's not. If someone is going to catfish you, they will do anything they need to in order to get you to their place, even if it means lying. Further, if I had the audacity to fake all of my photos and lie to people, why would I tell you the truth? Clearly you've already made up your mind that I’m a dishonest person if you’re asking such an irrelevant question. I have no reason to be honest if you’re implying that lying is my MO.
Where would I get so many fake photos of myself with consistent environments and body type etc.? His follow up question “then who are you?” basically can be translated to, “then who is this person in the photos?”. I am in a private condo at the same locations every day, every week. My pictures date back to a few years. If I was catfishing you, I wouldn’t stay there. I would work out of a hotel and move around so I couldn't be tracked. I wouldn't have made a website and social media with pictures. This is too much work for a catfish and they tend to switch pictures frequently. Attention to detail is crucial in comparing each photo - look at the condo, my body shape, hair colour and outfits. This is my best advice for people who may be doubting my identity and taking the time to read this article, although I believe there’s an inverse relationship between both of these factors.
Maybe asking these questions isn't asking for protection at all. Maybe there's other things, such as trying to make conversation or asking for another photo. Or maybe the person has had a bad experience in the past, are feeling nervous and trying to engage in messaging for me to reassure them. But, from my perspective, this isn't my battle to fight and we are adults who must take ownership for our actions instead of depending on a random stranger to build that confidence for you. Further, asking questions that are not logical shows an inability to respect my personal time and, therefore, indicates to me that we're not a good fit.
This is to say, I do enjoy engaging in conversation with those who I know and have met. It is sometimes a challenge to reply in a timely manner and those people who I hold near and dear understand this. I really appreciate how amazingly patient you all are with this shortcoming of mine.
If you doubt my identity, then save your time and save my time and don’t message me. Sometimes you have to take a chance in life to discover something great.
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