Dear Autumn;
You asked on X for people to share stories.
I trust you’ll respect my privacy as I would respect yours and so will share three that are meaningful to me. I’ll try to be brief.
But first, a little background (skip ahead if this is not of interest.)
Naturally my opinions here are mine alone – I won’t presume to know the views and experiences of others. A wide range of personality, agenda, desire and expectation exists across the industry. There’s still a lot I don’t understand.
The client side of this can feel a bit lonely starting out. SW world to a beginner is profoundly alluring while appearing secretive and confusing due to an understandable caution, especially in the US. The newbie must navigate a fear of asking or sharing because, as you know, many of us are sneaking about quietly deceiving people we love to meet an array of needs so we tend toward reserve and caution. The specter of being outed or worse hovers above all of us.
Review sites often read like competitive locker room braggadocio. Learning is slow and frustrating and can be harsh for newbies. Hard info is difficult to find and trust; no one teaches you, so you learn the old fashioned way by screwing up, stepping where one shouldn’t, being labeled a time-waster, offending, pissing off etc …
After many years I found some footing; Lola Divina (should be required client reading) and other books, multiple podcasts (Sienna’s “The Escort Deconstructed” was a favorite”), Twitter (remarkably instructive) and the kindness of a few very kind companions who (perhaps out of self-interest…?) took the time to patiently teach me … these have all contributed to my understanding of a world which some years ago was almost unknown to me.
I’m in my late 60’s and live in the US. I began spending time with companions of all types about 8 years ago… rubmaps, Backpages, Eros, Tryst, Private delights … MP, AMP, Tantra (both genuine and fake) … a range of Strip club “private dance” experiences, FS low-end, high-end, incall and outcall … short visits. Overnights,. Then a few years ago I discovered Canada … Indy companion, OIC, etc… Now I’m almost exclusively a customer in Toronto, Ottawa, and Montreal.
Story 1 – A Massage (2016)
Where, as a 100% green total newbie I stumble into an MP.
During frequent trips to and from NYC I’d driven dozens of times past a huge billboard on the Interstate without paying much attention. On this day curiosity got the better of me. I took the exit and experienced My first “rub’n’tug.”
The masseuse was cautious but quickly sized me up as client material.
She led me into a pleasant modest room with a table, candles, oils, etc…
“Do you know about tipping?”
“Um … I think so…?”
On a white-board she wrote a menu of options and rates. I was thrilled.
“May I get a nude massage with mutual touch?”
She immediately erased the board, the fee was left on a table, and what followed was pretty standard: No kissing or penetration, just a passable massage with some teasing and very slow buildup to a handy release. A quick wash up and I was back on the highway home.
The MA was sweet and patient… She seemed pleased with herself breaking in a newbie.
I was utterly delighted and returned a few times, but a door had been opened and began to comb the internet to discover all the variety of the industry in earnest.
.
Story 2 – V (2019
Where I met my first SW mentor
There was much trial and error. I got ghosted and ripped off a few times, and met one or two SWs who seemed unhappy about their situ – all part of learning, I guess. But I began to develop a relationship with the industry and investigate, relative to what was on offer, what exactly I was looking for beyond physical release and how might get better at finding a good fit.
My first sustained relationship was with a 20-something provider working out of her apartment in an eastern city. V became my teacher.
To me she seemed wise beyond her years, with a gentle willingness to patiently show me the basics - boundaries, tipping, queer dynamics, sub/dom roles (she was a sub), safety, references, gifts, light kink, and a variety of play (like letting me take polaroids of her and sending me copies) - drew me more fully in to the world of SW.
Most compelling was that she lived and celebrated an un-apologetic hedonistic world view that demonstrated to me what was possible; to walk beyond shadings of shame or apology that come with traditional vanilla values.
Around this time she showed me SW twitter. I’m aware that there are many strong views about X, but there was so much to be learned there – the bitter and the sweet.
One day V tweeted about the appeal of a fellow provider in their area and expressed a yearning for a session with her. I took the cue, set up a appointment with the two of them and experienced my first duo. It was a positive, really intense and satisfying session.
V dropped out view a few years ago. She was burdened with some rather serious health issues, and I believe she now works as a photographer for the industry. Every year on her birthday I send a small tribute as thanks for her many kindnesses all she taught me.
Story 3 – The Milking table. 2021
At some point the routines and limits of vanilla sessions began to feel unsatisfying.
An ad on Tryst introduced me to R where I discovered edging, tease and denial.
I’ve often joked with providers that I’m just another old guy clutching desperately at the remnants and illusions of a faded adolescent libido. Late in life I’ve finally discovered that the journey can be more satisfying than arriving at the destination.
I arrived at an upscale apartment in a nearby city for a 90 minute session and was met by a quiet, friendly, self-assured and very attractive woman dressed in a leather lingerie set who directed me to the shower with instructions of what and where to scrub.
I was led to a sturdy, draped massage table with a hole in the middle and invited to lie face down with my privates in a hole in the middle of the table.
First, it was an extraordinary massage. R is no amateur, offering a mixture of firm and gentle pressures with skilled hands. I relaxed into her and was instantly at ease.
After 20 minutes she transitioned, reaching down into the hole in the table to tease. I was in bliss. At some point ( I was in a bliss could and didn’t notice when this happened) she went under the table and rendered a skillful, playful, and uniquely intense experience – caressing, slapping, tickling, stroking, kissing, and pausing – that had me on edge for about 40 minutes, before bringing me to a release unlike any I’d known before.
I was shocked when, during that release, she began to tickle the head of my very aroused and sensitive cock. I cried out for her to stop – she was ruining the climax! - but she only giggled, brought the session to its conclusion and headed to off to shower before me, leaving me a panting, limp and exhausted wet rag on the table.
After I rinsed off we chatted briefly. I commended her for a remarkable and very satisfying experience but mentioned that the tickle as I climaxed took away from my pleasure. Was that really necessary? She smiled mischievously and remarked, “But that’s the fun part!” and then showed me a framed harness swing and invited me to return for a pegging.
I did return to her a few times ( though not for a pegging… yet) and will again.
I feel she has much to teach… though, for now, at least, that concluding tickle remains problematic for me.
I’ve met with others who offer a milking table experience and none are equal to Rachael.
There are so many other stories that came to mind as I wrote this…
I hope next time I’m in TO we can meet for a visit and a session.
Earl
Comments